一二三四五六七，我的朋友在哪里？ -

Thursday, April 19, 2007

don't know why i'm so restless today. thinking of so much things, reflecting on my day. i duno.. i jus feel so bu zhi zai. my art.. i hab no confidence in it. i don't feel like wad mr ho said "treat art as a leisure". to me everything i do is busy here busy der. i really need more rest. the friends in my school. so much trouble between them (us). it really irritates me ALOT. i can't for a moment forget da things different party says. like i'm the middle person u know. both sides tell me their view of the other party and i just.. i wana tell my tots!

STOP!!!

i can't.. i'll hurt the other party. i told dem to my parents and they advice me. i'm not really.. haiz.. i just feel like SCREAMING! urgh!!!!!! if this is so, i rather not have any - none. sometime i just hold back my tears. i wan to tell ppl wad are my views, dey shouldn't be doing that cos i was tot values, character in church.(THank GOD!) i dun wan ppl to walk that path. BUT wat do i get back..? "shut up", "f***", "why you so..", "u irritate me sometime".. ok.. i had enough. my grades are dropping really badly. i dun care if others have worst marks than me and i'm not comparing. it is jus that all the expectations all burden me. it is like i have no choice.. do i? don't rely on me too much all of you. cos u all can't. i'm fricked minded.. i'm sorry to all ppl i've laid my anger on but why.. why can't ALL of us get along. why must we hate. i'm an out-going girl~sort of. i tried to mix around apart from the mocking and scorns of others. i just wish all of us can make tings clear with one another, sort it out and be as a class. this has gone on like years. all the firing back and forth. WHAT IS WITH ALL OF YOU PEOPLE? i know i'm being a wee bit rude but.. ok.. i've said enough. i'm tired.. it is for all of you to decide. your future..
Dear friends.. BE A PART NOT APART!

3:56 AM alone with my cup of tea